My oldest is almost 12 and soon he'll get the Priesthood. One thing Mark and I decided a long time ago was that the "missionary haircut" would be one of the hills we were going to pick to die on. Parents of girls have to deal with modesty issues and parents of boys often have to fight hair length. What's weird is that I constantly point out to my kids that long hair is the MINORITY. Most boys have a decently short hair-cut. But, they see it the other way - as if EVERYONE but them has shaggy hair hanging in their eyes.
So, every time we say, "time for a haircut!", we get a mini-revolt now. It's not that we make them get a buzz cut - it just must be off their collars and over their ears without any funkiness (like a Mohawk).
We came up with a plan to let our boys exercise their "agency". Notice I didn't say, "Free agency" but it's never free - there's always a trade-off. Well, here's the trade-off. I told them that they could have longer hair, but if they choose to let their hair grow, they will not play computer games, their handhelds or the Wii as long as their hair exceeds parental guidelines. It was their choice. Did they want the long hair bad enough to give up all their games?
Of course they both immediately cried foul on that one. But, I reminded them that I was giving them an option to choose. I wasn't going to say, "no long hair" and impose that on them, but I was going to make it a hard choice for them.
So far, the hair is short...
So, every time we say, "time for a haircut!", we get a mini-revolt now. It's not that we make them get a buzz cut - it just must be off their collars and over their ears without any funkiness (like a Mohawk).
We came up with a plan to let our boys exercise their "agency". Notice I didn't say, "Free agency" but it's never free - there's always a trade-off. Well, here's the trade-off. I told them that they could have longer hair, but if they choose to let their hair grow, they will not play computer games, their handhelds or the Wii as long as their hair exceeds parental guidelines. It was their choice. Did they want the long hair bad enough to give up all their games?
Of course they both immediately cried foul on that one. But, I reminded them that I was giving them an option to choose. I wasn't going to say, "no long hair" and impose that on them, but I was going to make it a hard choice for them.
So far, the hair is short...
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