I have always loved the "What Ere Thou Art, Act Well Thy Part" that President Kimball used to talk about. It was something he saw on his mission in Great Britain and it had a profound effect on his life.
I'm altering it a little to say "What Ere Thou Art, LOOK Well Thy Part" because I have known way too many kids who looked one way and acted another. Most of the time, it was a disservice to themselves but they didn't realize it.
Many years ago when we were newlyweds, Mark was the Young Men's president in our ward. There was a young man in the ward who was probably the NICEST boy you'd ever meet. He was polite and respectful and interacted well with adults. I used to tell Mark that I hoped our children (when we had them) would grow up to be like this young man. Even though there was more than 10 years between he and Mark, he ended up becoming a treasured friend that we still run into occasionally.
This young man did not look well his part, though. Despite his wonderful demeanor and personality, he looked like someone who had just come down from the mountains. Sometimes it bordered on the "UnaBomber" look - long scraggly hair, grungy clothes and a scrubby beard. People immediately judged him to be a no-respect loser. I used to think, "B, you aren't doing yourself any favors with that look!" You might say, "Well, people shouldn't judge." But honestly, we make judgments every day. This young man looked like he should be holding a sign begging on the side of the road more than he looked like the nice young man he was. If I didn't know him, what WAS I supposed to think about him???
I see the same thing with young women - nice girls who don't dress like nice girls. Why would you want someone to think you're not a nice girl? People make judgments about who you are by how you're dressed - PERIOD. That will never change no matter how hard we wish it would.
Honestly, I'll admit, I'm ULTRA bugged by the LDS "stars" (especially the dancing ones) who wear not a single stitch of clothes more than the the other non-LDS girls. Seriously, how hard is it to make at least an attempt at covering your private parts?? You don't have to dress like an Amish woman, but you could easily say, "Hey, I'd like to have that neckline a little higher, please." I have the utmost respect for Charlene Wells and the other pageant girls who have worn 1 piece suits and gowns with sleeves and backs despite the pressure to do otherwise.
As for me - I want people to notice that I dress nicely BUT that I also cover those things which should be covered. I buy my sleeves just a little longer. I make sure I find white blouses that don't reveal everything under them and I make sure that when I sit down, that I don't have to fight my skirt or shorts to keep everything under wraps. It's really not that hard to do. How I look should match my attitude and belief system. I am grateful for a mother who taught me that from the time I was small. I have always tried to "Look Well My Part" and will teach our boys to do the same.
I'm altering it a little to say "What Ere Thou Art, LOOK Well Thy Part" because I have known way too many kids who looked one way and acted another. Most of the time, it was a disservice to themselves but they didn't realize it.
Many years ago when we were newlyweds, Mark was the Young Men's president in our ward. There was a young man in the ward who was probably the NICEST boy you'd ever meet. He was polite and respectful and interacted well with adults. I used to tell Mark that I hoped our children (when we had them) would grow up to be like this young man. Even though there was more than 10 years between he and Mark, he ended up becoming a treasured friend that we still run into occasionally.
This young man did not look well his part, though. Despite his wonderful demeanor and personality, he looked like someone who had just come down from the mountains. Sometimes it bordered on the "UnaBomber" look - long scraggly hair, grungy clothes and a scrubby beard. People immediately judged him to be a no-respect loser. I used to think, "B, you aren't doing yourself any favors with that look!" You might say, "Well, people shouldn't judge." But honestly, we make judgments every day. This young man looked like he should be holding a sign begging on the side of the road more than he looked like the nice young man he was. If I didn't know him, what WAS I supposed to think about him???
I see the same thing with young women - nice girls who don't dress like nice girls. Why would you want someone to think you're not a nice girl? People make judgments about who you are by how you're dressed - PERIOD. That will never change no matter how hard we wish it would.
Honestly, I'll admit, I'm ULTRA bugged by the LDS "stars" (especially the dancing ones) who wear not a single stitch of clothes more than the the other non-LDS girls. Seriously, how hard is it to make at least an attempt at covering your private parts?? You don't have to dress like an Amish woman, but you could easily say, "Hey, I'd like to have that neckline a little higher, please." I have the utmost respect for Charlene Wells and the other pageant girls who have worn 1 piece suits and gowns with sleeves and backs despite the pressure to do otherwise.
As for me - I want people to notice that I dress nicely BUT that I also cover those things which should be covered. I buy my sleeves just a little longer. I make sure I find white blouses that don't reveal everything under them and I make sure that when I sit down, that I don't have to fight my skirt or shorts to keep everything under wraps. It's really not that hard to do. How I look should match my attitude and belief system. I am grateful for a mother who taught me that from the time I was small. I have always tried to "Look Well My Part" and will teach our boys to do the same.
Posts
5 comments:
HIGH FIVE!!! :D
And have you seen the "trend" for LDS girls at dances lately? Dresses that don't pass the kneeling test (need to go back to that) and mid-calf leggings. OIY!! That's why I'm never asked to be at the "standards" table when the kids are coming in. I'd offend too many girls by having them put on one of the complimentary skirts.
I've even seen that look on adult women. I would feel funny wearing "pants" to church like that.
But, then, who was it that said recently, "Modesty is not how you dress, it's an attitude of the heart". I think it was Bonnie Parkin who said that at a youth conference in Brazil where, despite the hot and muggy temps she was thrilled to see so many young women dressed modestly.
I believe modesty and dressing your part IS more about your attitude than anything else.
I agree completely with your premise, but I believe that President McKay was the one who saw this quote during his mission to Scotland.
http://www.amazon.com/What-Eer-Thou-Well-Part/dp/0963473298
Ahhh, thank you - you're right. It didn't seem right when I wrote it but I was refereeing some *ahem* "disagreement" between sons when I was writing it.
Absolutely Kim! It's all in the attitude and truly what is your BEST in your closet and not just what you feel comfortable in.
It's difficult to forget that clothing experience I shared with you a few months back. Still makes me shake my head. LOVE Sister Allred's talk from this weekend that included that aspect.
Post a Comment